There are few things in life that feel as good as someone thanking you for helping them.
Recently I spoke at a music teachers conference about the effects of tinnitus in a life in music. In fact, as I write this, I’m on a plane over the mid-west United States on my way home from that very conference.
The third morning of my stay I was having breakfast on the patio of the hotel restaurant. As I started eating, I spotted a lady coming towards me with what can only be described as focused determination. She had heard about my seminar the previous day from some friends of hers and had spent all afternoon evening and morning trying to track me down.
She was very excited and breathing rapidly when she came right up to me and said, “Paul, I’m so happy I finally found you.” She went on to say how sorry she was that she missed the seminar but how grateful she felt to actually speak to me in private. I’ve had this happen to me many times before so I knew I was about to do some serious soul work.
I invited her to sit down while I finished eating and tell me her story. I was anticipating a sad story because, hardly anyone who tracks me down wants to tell me how great their life is. Anyway, as I suspected she was in turmoil. She was losing her sight due to a rare disease and wanted to get my advice on how to cure it.
I explained that I have no experience in healing ailments such as this and that I was not a licensed doctor or miracle healer. She understood that but still wanted to know what I would suggest for her particular situation.
So, after listening intently to her story and the intricate details of how she felt she had arrived at this point in her life, I started with the same question I ask everyone. “What is it that you truly want?”
She replied quickly with the answer I fully expected, “I don’t want to lose my sight.”
And, just as I do when I coach tinnitus patients I shot back, “I didn’t ask you want you don’t want, I asked you what you do want.” “What’s the difference?” she asked.
“There’s a big difference,” I said. “In fact, knowing what you don’t want and focusing on what you don’t want is a certain recipe for blindness.” I could see by the look on her face that she did not really see how this was possible.
But, as I’ve stated many times before, focusing on a problem and trying to fix it, with the same mind that created the problem, will not work, ever!
Over the next hour and a half I did my very best to give her the benefit of my experience. We talked about the law of attraction and how the mind wants to habitually focus on problems. I also suggested that she share with me something that she doesn’t have in her life right now but has always wanted to have. In other words I asked, “Is there something you would like to do with your life that you’ve always wanted to do?”
She lit up like a Christmas tree. “I’ve always wanted to make furniture!” So I asked her, “why did you choose to be a music teacher?” “Because,” she said, “I was good at it and it pays the bills so that’s what I’ve always done.”
“You know,” I said, “the vast majority of people don’t know what they want in life so they settle for whatever comes along.”
Throughout our time together I truly tried my best to be a beacon and get her headed in the right direction. I asked her to pursue her dream of becoming a furniture maker and to stop focusing on “not going blind.” Even, if she does eventually go blind I know in my heart that if she pursues her goal she will have a full life, regardless of the circumstances that surround her situation.
This is good advice. If you are not willing to go after what it is you want in life you will never truly be happy, period. We all have a purpose and it’s up to each of us to listen to our hearts and follow that purpose. Anything less is less than good enough and is a sure recipe for perpetual unhappiness.
As she thanked me for our time together I could tell that she was truly touched by my words. She had a smile on her face that was nothing short of joyous. I felt so good to have helped her. And, because I know and live the law of attraction I knew that I would be rewarded somehow, that’s just the way it works. I don’t expect it, I just know it.
The next day, I checked into a 5 star resort and a 3 room palatial hacienda for only $99 a night. A colleague had set it up and for the next 2 days I lived in the lap of luxury. Is it luck? I think not.
There is one sure way of getting more of what you want in life and that’s to help others get what they want.
The author, Paul Tobey, has a number of eBooks, audio seminars and articles on how to deal with Tinnitus. His own journey with tinnitus has taken him around the world to share his story and healing concepts with others. If you have ringing in the ears please check out his tinnitus webpage.
